
I'm skeptical of anything that uses the word "European." Especially if you call your product a "Fine European" item, that just screams "amateur hour" to me. Add to that the (perhaps unfair) stigma of being deeply discounted at the store, and I had pretty low expectations. I bought this 5.3 ounce/150 gram bar of chocolate on sale for a mere dollar - cheaper than a Hershey bar of comparable size. I was skeptical, as you might imagine!
Upon unwrapping the bar, the first thing I noticed was a weird skunky scent from the packaging. This smell appears to be coming from the paper outer wrapper, and to have seeped in through the silvery inner wrapping. The smell makes me think of the mimeograph machines of my youth; of toner, and print shops, and the smell of a fresh ream of copy paper. It's similar to the smell of a tire store's display lobby, but not quite the same.
It's not a bad smell per se, but it's also not what you would call a delicious smell, either.
The inner wrapper looks like it would be foil, but actually seems to be just waxed paper dressed up in an aluminum foil costume for Halloween. Which is what allowed the smell of the paper outer wrapping has seeped inside, and flavored the chocolate.
When combined with the smell of milk chocolate, that weird office supply smell does some pretty weird things. And again I have to admit, it wasn't altogether bad. I can think of worse smells to combine with chocolate. Like ashtray, or cat pee, or broccoli.
Unfortunately, things started going south once I got to the taste portion of the exercise. Sadly, this bar of chocolate left behind a definite aftertaste of fresh rubber.
This was the day I learned about the importance of actual aluminum foil. Instead of something that looks like aluminum foil, but is actually quite permeable to smells.
It's a pity, because otherwise this would have been a perfectly nice bar of chocolate. Milk chocolate that isn't too sweet is a rarity in this country. The texture was firm without being brittle, and smooth without being waxy. It melted nicely in the mouth, without leaving a film behind on my fingertips.
The "European" claim appears to be correct, as this chocolate is from Poland by way of an importer in Scottsdale, AZ. Poland is indeed in Europe, although I'll wager that if you say "European chocolate" most people think of Germany or Switzerland.
Actually I have no doubt that Poland produces its fair share of perfectly good chocolate. But this isn't some of it. I peered more closely at the label and realized that the company name was Global Brands, and it turns out to be just what you would expect. And apparently the price on this chocolate bar wasn't a fluke, because Global Brands produces a variety of snack foods aimed at the Dollar Store market. "A world of great values," their website proclaims, "You won't believe it retails for $1!"
Sadly, I WOULD believe that. Very much so, in fact.
